I started this blog in 2014. It was a big time of transition for me and I didn’t know where this was going.

One part of being a writer is finding one’s language. Another is finding what you really want to write about. The hardest part is then to express this message, this pouring out of the heart, unencumbered, so as to relate heart to heart, soul to soul, being to being.


Searching for the meaning of life is probably the most well-travelled bandwagon in the Universe. What is so fascinating about it? Is looking for life’s meaning really meaningful? Or does our incessant search prevent us from finding what we are actually looking for? 

You have probably read dozens of articles or books, some of those my own, on the big subject “What is the meaning and purpose of our life and how do I find both?”.

Ultimately, the question after life’s meaning and purpose is about a very basic need: “What do I do with the time given to me on this planet? What can I do in this life, that has meaning to me, that is important, that pleases and gratifies me?”. Whatever that may be for you. It might be something big or utterly mundane.

One might ask… how much do we actually do in full consciousness during a given day? What carries meaning for us as individuals? How often do we do things “simply” because we always did them like this, because it is expected from us, because we learned to do them this way and not the other? Get up, coffee, breakfast, commuting to work and some 9 to 5 to finish it off. The French call this “Metro, boulot, dodo.”. Subway, work, sleep. Much of our everyday meanderings is routine. And that is a good thing. Many of our experiences and social interactions happen within the relatively small circle of our colleagues, our family, our friends. That is comforting, that is good.

That being said, is it really THAT important for things to make sense and have meaning all the time? Does our yearning for meaning rather result from our need to spin a retrospective narrative about our last day, our last year?

Let’s shed another light on this. Simple and basal. What unites us, no matter who or where we are or how we live, is our pursuit of happiness and joy.

That’s it. To be happy. That is the common denominator.

That perspective is everything but new. Logically. But let’s look at happiness. It is easier said than done. Look at our Western society. Material plenty, little existential hardship, many many options for the majority of people. Does this make us any happier? Apparently not. Mental illness is on the rise. The complexity and freedom of choice of our modern life may be too tough a challenge for many. So who is happier? Modern, Western man or the African farmer plowing his field for 16 hours a day, because otherwise there won’t be anything to eat come fall. We will never now that and it isn’t really relevant either. What matters is our own perspective, our own measure of happiness and joy.

What I am after with this analogy is this: does our ability and freedom to intellectually and philosophically pursue the meaning of our existence actually make us any happier? Or is happiness and meaning rather the result of a direct, mindless and immediate experience of oneself in the here and now, which is so hard to find?

Happiness is no mind-game. Happiness is a feeling. And the raw emotion behind it is joy. And that’s where the problem is… within us. Happiness and joy are the sweets and treats in our emotional food chart. Three hours of laughter… but please no more. Experiencing and sharing happiness… two hours, but then back into the grinder, please. How often did you hear or speak the following sentence at work, at school, among friends: “Again with the big grin, this one. And it’s not even 9. So happy it is pissing me off. That is not natural. There must be something wrong about this guy.”. Sounds familiar?

All good things come to an end we were told. Happiness and joy are not built to last. But is that really true?

To me, joy flows from the moment. From the here and now. Breathe, feel and be. No distracting thoughts. Focus. Being deeply anchored in whatever is right now. No plans, no to-do lists, no agendas. Simply joy. Without meaning, without purpose. There is your happy wanderer.

Being in the here and now, bathing in this source of joy and happiness is something you can learn and cultivate. To the point that it does not go away anymore, ever. Of course you are still angry and sad. Sure, things turn to a steaming pile of shit sometimes. But your source of joy will be there. In the background.

“Background joy” one might call it. Our children show us how this works. Every day. Does gnawing on a spoon for 3 hours make any sense to a baby (ignoring the 50 expensive toys)?Certainly not. But it’s joy and gratitude are plainly visible.

Some practical thoughts. I personally en-joy combining what I am good at with what I want and with what I can share with others. It is more blessed to give, than to receive. Creating something with others gives me bliss. Co-creation. A great source of joy to me is contact to other people. At work, at parties, watching a game, celebrating at a festival. This is especially true for the workshops I give. And then there is the joy of performing mindless repetitive tasks. Routinely, ritually, almost automatically doing the same thing over and over again is great. Pure meditation.

Many people enjoy challenges. Many relish in enacting their life’s story publicly.

Meditation has helped me locate my mind’s off-switch and deeply anchor myself in the here and now. That is all I need. For it is from this place of meaningless joy, of pure being and sheer presence that I act in a way that only amplifies my joy, my happiness and that of the ones around me. Everything unfolds, synchronistically, from the inside to the outside.

Not doing anything thus blesses you most. That is certainly the point, where most people I talk to, yield. Just be and the rest will follow? That is very much at odds with the way we think things are.

But it works. Very well, indeed.

Maybe the meaning of life is about losing it. And along with it any intellectual concept about ourselves and the world. So that something else may surface.

Pure being.
Existence in the here and now.


That is meditation.

Have a great week


Today marks the final day of my personal interpretation of the Hinduist tenets of the Veda. Those of you who would like to learn more about my point of view on the first six tenets and how I came in touch with all of this may read here and here.

I could not write it more accessible than it is. Hard to digest it may be, but maybe you take away one thing or the other.

So let us sound the final round: East vs. Benjamin.

I introduce the Vedic tenet and then interpret it in my words.

Today we will talk about the “Eight Fundamental Truths of Vedic Wisdom”. Number VII-VIII.

East VII: Vedic Wisdom
“The Vedic sound conveys complete knowledge.”

Benjamin VII: theopusinfinity
“All is vibration. All vibration is a derivative of the one vibration. The sound of God. Many think this is the A.U.M (often referred to as the Ohm or Om) but it’s not. You hear God’s sound in your heart. Heartbeat, the pulse of your heart, the pulse of your energy field that creates your body. Higher vibration translates into lower vibration. Consciousness may become “matter”. 1-2-3-1-2-3-3, that is the heartbeat of the cosmos. Male-Female-Neutral-Male-Female-Neutral-Neutral. The universes dances a Waltz. Your breath expresses all of this. Meditate on that, so that the sound may rise within you. You will see, that this sound is the resonance of the ONE love. Then your word will be creation itself.

East VIII: Vedic Wisdom
“Complete knowledge means understanding the relationship between all that is and the personality of God. ”

Benjamin VIII: theopusinfinity
“God neither is nor has a personality. It is no SELF. It IS. Awareness of IS-NESS through BEING. It is SELF-LESS-NESS. Completion and complete knowledge may be found in the humble and sincere acceptance of this truth. They may be received through letting-go of the individual SELF. “I give myself up utterly to you my God.”. Completeness and complete knowledge lie in the understanding of the relationship of BEING to being. In I to I AM. In time to timelessness. In space to singularity. Consciousness is a process of self-reference, thereby establishing two or more states. Separation is thus an integral prerequisite for self awareness and, at the same time, expression of the consciousness of ALL BEINGS in our universe. Oneness gained from this understanding is a derivative of separation. It is separate from separation and thus NOT the final state. That is NONE-NESS. In relating NONE-NESS to ONE-NESS the true meaning of both may be gleaned. This is well expressed in the movie “Interstellar”. Matthew’s key sentence: “We brought us here ourselves.”.

I hope this finds you at the right time and place.



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Good morning. Sipping my coffee, inhaling non-spiritual fumes and enjoying myself and my optimized Facebook feed (I unsubscribed a lot of stuff) I stumbled across this video.

It is a conversation between JP Sears and The Lifetarian. I know JP from his funny videos and we digitally exchanged appreciation and understanding when he reacted to two or three of my comments. I did not know The Lifetarian but from the way he asks questions, makes conversation and a quick scan of his video titles and video thumbnails I can say “I Like”. I will definitely have a look at his work. His question about “How is your day? How people structure their day tells me a lot about their magick.” really hit home with me.

So check these guys out. Now the video. “Momentum Conversation”. This one has a lot of it and then some. I love it. It so down to earth, so relaxing, so honest. They just tell it as it is.

Let me introduce JP again. JP Sears is very successful with his funny “How to be Ultra Spiritual” videos. Already, these videos contain a lot of great information on how to look honestly into the mirror and become aware of our perceptual gaps when it comes to viewing yourself.

He has a number of great “serious” videos on his YouTube Channel.

I recommend his videos on narcissim and self-sabotage since I think many spiritual people, beginning with myself, have a wagonload of both.

Convincing oneself of talking to Archangel Michael or adopting the view “You are the Creator” takes a lot of ego and a lot of narcissim. This is not a bad thing at all. I mean, this ego-driven dynamic drives spiritual development up to a certain point. The way “mainstream spirituality” is marketed always pushes two buttons. Self-grandiosity and very childish needs. That is ok too.

Self-sabotage is widespread two, especially among new-agers. Money is bad, success is bad, bad feelings are bad, being among low-vibration people is bad, a partner will limit my free spirit.

Been there, done that as well.

This system of belief can become very stable over time, especially if you begin to press the send button and work with people based on the incomplete awareness (master apprentice view). Outside bravado, a great fan base, followers become the currency with which you stabilize your inherently unstable system. Not so good in my view, but in my experience, an inescapable stepping stone and recurring theme you can work with.

This video is about that. Funny and true. Oh, now I repeated myself.

Have a great day




Today, I am going to tackle the next three tenets (IV-VI) of the Eight Fundamental Truths of Vedic Wisdom. For those of you who missed my post on the first three, please read here

The Vedas are hinduist texts. An initially oral tradition was later translated into a written canon. The emergence of the Vedas is connected to the arrival of the Arya (1500 B.C.), what suggests a possible earlier origin. The Vedas may thus be one of the oldest legacies known to humankind.

While interpreting tenets I-III came relatively easy, part II proved more difficult. But hey, I wouldn’t be my planed-sized ego myself, if I wouldn’t rise to the challenge ;-).

Let us discuss the “Eight Fundamental Truths of Vedic Wisdom”, number IV-VI.

East IV: Vedic Wisdom
“The material world is the world of dualities and is thus structured multidimensionally and multipolarly.”

Benjamin IV: theopusinfinity
“Let me say the following: this is an allegory of a physics that we are just beginning to understand (relativity, quantum mechanics, string theory, branes etc.). Note: allegory. A one-to-one transfer will not work. However, savour this, this is not Stephen Hawking or Einstein talking. No, it comes from a text 3500 years old. Now.

Let us look at the statement itself. Reading this, I cannot put together the first and the last part of the sentence. My first impulse is to yield. But that is not me. Everyone can understand anything is my personal creed.

So, let us divvy this up. “The material world is the world of dualities…”. So far so good. I think we can all subscribe to that. A world of good and evil, light and dark, hot and cold (compare hermetic principle of polarity). Our world is structured in pairs of opposites.

Lets discuss the “thus” later.

Second part of the sentence “[is] structured multidimensionally and multipolarly.”. Well, that seems to be the exact opposite of duality. Multidimensional or multipolar means what? Everything is relative. Everything is relative. The observer effect from cosmology (multidimensional) and quantum mechanics (multipolar). 1500 B.C. Wow. Hence, as the material world has two opposing poles, it might not from the perspective of another dimension. Einstein once stated that only 3 people on the planet will understand his theory of relativity as most men already struggle with the 3rd dimension. That being said, lets leave physics. Let us replace dimension with “felt reality”. That is when things start making sense. For one person, a summer vacation is great, the other guy loves Island in winter, with infinite shades of grey inbetween. Person 3 does not care about going on vacation at all. Relativity may thus be defined dependent on various scales (dimensions) of what is good or not. The concept of a “felt reality” grants us both the opportunity and ability to view and interpret reality completely different than our neighbor or ourself 5 minutes ago.

However, the shared reality we generally live in is more of a “thought-of reality”, enabling us to interact. The good old Matrix.

“Thus” is the material world multidimensional and multipolar. We exist only by the points of reference we decide to set ourselves. The system we live in is intrinsically endogenous (self-begotten). An observer able of sensation, feeling and thought transforms the “duality trap” into a “felt reality” where everything is possible. The only prerequisite is to actively enact this “felt reality” in awareness of self as a sumproduct of sensation, emotion and thought.

East V: Vedic Wisdom
“The meaning of existence in the material world consists in freeing ourselves from it und reach the spiritual world.”

Benjamin V: theopusinfinity
“Wherever you want to be you are there already. You just have to realise that. You do that through dissolving your perceptual inefficiencies with respect to your inner process one step at a time – if you want to (dis-illusion). On top, I think it is unnecessary to define the meaning of existence that narrowly. Being a good father, a successful manager or a shepherd out in the wild the whole day is more than enough to me personally. Everybody has his or her “felt reality”. That is the meaning of “All roads lead to Rome” (e. g. the heart). To me that is the meaning of “freeing” ourselves from the material world, “freeing” ourselves from duality (Buddhism “maya” = illusion, Native Americans = “smoky mirror”, compare Parable of the Cave, Plato). Death, Ascension, Descension or whatever you want to call it are mere metaphors. Many people strive for ascension. I wanna be a dog in a loving family. So lets do both. You just unlock a new, additional LEVEL. And the Boss is always you ;-). Well in my case it is Barney Stinson. Self high-five.

East VI: Vedic Wisdom
“Our senses translate but a tiny portion of reality in a distorted form into our consciousness.

Benjamin VI: theopusinfinity
“That is exactly my point in V. Perceptual inefficiencies. The biggest one in most of our contempary world-views is the following: outside precedes inside. The outside world is fixed and real. The inner world is mutable and relative. That physicists dig up evidence on the contrary for more than 100 years has yet to reach mass consciousness and consensus reality. Another perceptual inefficiency is that our personality, character or ego is our self. That is not the case. The final, and in my view largest and most fatal inefficiency is that of free will. The thought process of an average person, myself included, is a fuzzy-logic contradictory program made of socialisation, family and public education, indoctrination, marketing and self-imposed rules. The core of that program is “conscience”, which serves as a mental instance imposing control and compliance with societal norms.  It is this program that limits our perception of reality MASSIVELY. Your sense of reason is NEVER in the here and now. That would be contrary to its function.  It categorized, evaluates etc.. Reality, in spiritual and older philosophical traditions, is always defined as perceiving what REALLY IS (via the body). And the only thing we can perceive with a reasonable degree of certainty is the realm of our sensations, emotions and thoughts. Everything else is out of SCOPE, it is part of an sensory apparatus that is directed outward, which has little additonal benefit for your personal growth past the age of 7. Directing our senses inward permits us to slowly regain a feeling for what’s real. What immutably IS. Being. I have this meditation project called The Mellowmind Experience (German). The experience of a mellow mind. I do this workshop called “Mind – Head? Off!”. Mind sees reality. Head (brain, reason, ego etc.) does not, though it later plays a very important role.


Have a great day.


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My spiritual journey has yet not brought me in any extensive and meaningful contact with far-eastern schools. I feel I am quite the oddity, as many Westeners turn to Hinduist and Buddhist philosophy and meditation first thing.

Well, I am one of those guys that could probably increase their far-eastern knowlege five-fold by watching “Eat, Pray, Love”. Luckily I do not have to go down this painfully womanly path (;-)).  I owe that to three people in my life that think about Hinduism and Buddhism a lot. The “winkelbauer” (Austrian blog winklbauer.wordpress.com) and Mr. T.

Today is all about Mr. T, a true seeker set on his far-eastern path. He sent me a letter (yep, a real one) containing the “Eight Fundamental Truths of Vedic Wisdom”.

While reading, I was, once again astonished about how people all over the world reach almost identical conclusions completely independent of tradition, culture of school of thought. They reach these conclusion through a humble and sincere pursuit of knowing themselves.

I want to take the chance today, to give you an example of what I mean. I will interpret the Vedic Wisdom in my own words. Without any background research. Just from my heart.

Let us discuss the “Eight Fundamental Truths of Vedic Wisdom”, number I-III.

East I: Vedic Wisdom
“The material world is but a reflection of the spiritual reality.”

Benjamin I: theopusinfinity
“The Matrix is real, but essentially benign. It gives us the gift of experience (of good and evil – of duality). The role-play (of duality) we play with ourselves serves the expansion of one’s consciousness and the expansion of the awareness of God of itself. The world of ideas, the spiritual realm, is causal, immutable in God and thus real. The material world is the world of effects (except for the Big Bang if that ever happened), impermanent and thus not real.”

East II: Vedic Wisdom
“All That Is has its origin in the personality of God”

Benjamin II: theopusinfinity
“All That Is is Source. Source is the Heart, the singularity. There is no separation between Self and God. God does not have a personality. It is SELF ITSELF. I really don’t know why they use personality. I assume it is a translation error. Personality, character or ego is a strictly human concept that is not in alignment with SELF ITSELF. It is the mastery of personality, character and ego through recognition of the original SELF we are invited to achieve in this world. The emphasis is on mastery, not destruction or transcendence, for transcendence can only be achieved through mastery and nothing else. Remember: it is Gollum who destroys the ring.”

East III: Vedic Wisdom
“Every living being is an eternal spiritual soul and thus originally inhabitants of the spiritual world.”

Benjamin III: theopusinfinity
“I think this is complicated, only half-true and lacks the insights inherent to the previous two statements. It is dishonest. Living beings (humans, animals, plants, minerals) are emanations of consciousness. Consciousness is eternal, since Consciousness is Source, is God. God is God only through being eternal, omni-present, omni-scient and omni-potent at the same “time”. The idea of a soul, is, in my opinion, a very human concept that appeals to the narcissism of the seeking personality of each human. Consciousness in One, is uni-form. There is no concept of a part-whole relationship. The ALL is the ALL. You can picture this with the image of a drop of water dropping into an ocean. This drop is your soul at the end of this incarnation. How likely is it, that the ocean will produce the same drop again? To me, the idea of a, somewhat individualized entity, called soul with a unique signature over time is only a stepping stone towards understanding UNITY. The beauty of the soul concept is, that it gives us the ability to tell collective stories over large stretches of time. It is a 4-D concept. The spiritual world is at least 5-D. There time and space does not exist. Everything happens here and now. We exist everywhere now. Our incarnated self is part of the illusion that me are invited to end. We do not have to strive to be a spiritual being in this incarnation. We are by default. We exist on all levels and dimensions, in all cause-and-effect relationships everywhere. There is no effort to go anywhere. We are there already.”

It is time we realise that on a global scale. I’m in. You too?

Have a great day


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We have been getting used to starting the new year with resolutions. What do we want to do, what do we want to achieve?

In itself, this is a beautiful ritual. We look back. 2015, how was that? We gaze at the fireworks in the sky in delight. Maybe, for a little while, we feel at peace. Complete. We are wish-lessly happy (German idiom that does not translate).

And then we look at the next year. And maybe, we draw deep on our innermost wishes, from the wishing well of our heart.

And THEN, our brain enters the stage and screws-up everything. Wishes become resolutions: “You have to loose weight.”. “You have to stop smoking.”. Do this, do that.

Why? Why does everything have to boil down to doing something? Why do we allow ourselves to deprive us of our power, our force? Why does our sense of self-confidence crumble so easily in the face of “You must”, “You should” and doubt?

Why not go about it differently this time? Enter 2016 with an open mind. Leave the outcome open. Maybe, this is a good year for inner work and enlightenment? Why don’t you say to yourself: “I am going to use 2016 for self-discovery.”? Self-discovery and self-knowledge as a catalyst towards inner peace, happiness and awesomeness? Towards bliss? Towards self-confidence?

You will be surprised, I think, how powerful this decision is and how comprehensively it will affect your inner process. An inner process, that will yield oh so many tangible results over the next weeks, months and years.

Now, let us talk about meditation as one of the practices you can use to make this happen. Using self-knowledge and self-confidence as a catalyst for whatever you want.

If you are new to all of this, it would seem to you that sitting around quietly doing nothing is a complete waste of time…

However, reflect his… the smartphone with which you read this article, the chair in which you sit, the clothes you are wearing and the money you used to buy all that… all of those things are fruits of somebody’s IMAGINATION, of someone’s FORCE TO MANIFEST. The all started out as simple ideas that somebody brought to life. And you are profiting from that, right here, right now.

How does that break down for you, personally? Each and every idea you have can be brought to life. Just think about your favorite past projects. Building or renovating a house for your family. Planning your dream vacation. In the beginning there was but a wish, a yearning, a need, an idea. You see: manifestation works (and has worked in your life), if you FOCUS your attention on your idea and ACT accordingly.

Using this process of manifesting our ideas and dreams is a challenge to most of us. We beginn to THINK ABOUT what we want. And very quickly the feces-throwing rioting monkeys that are our UNFOCUSSED thoughts sabotage our heart-driven process with concern and fear. They activate negative though patterns and reinforce a negative belief system that serves itself, but not us. Our inability to consistently refocus our thoughts on what we truly want in that situation leads to what? NOTHING.

Now picture the opposite. How would it feel like if you could learn to focus thus enabling yourself to let your wonderful idea, your dream, your ideal life unfold right in front of you. The absence of unfocused thought unleashes the emotional and creative momentum you need to conceive of, think and feel your dream as something that resonates 100 % with the statement “This is who I am”. At that point, you have no choice but to act this out.

YES – then, and only then, do things start to develop in the direction you wish.

So focus seems to be the silver bullet. What can help you focus? Meditation!. A ritualized meditation practice is, so I think, the best way to lay a strong foundation for realizing your dream.

I have this project going in Germany. “The Mellowmind Experience”. My slogan is, not by chance, “more focus, more joy, more freedom”. To me, it is just that. Teach yourself how to keep your mind mellow. Focus on that. Make an experience. Experience joy and through that freedom. Experience yourself through meditation. And act this out in life. Until at one point, both become one and the same.

Meditation encourages you to accept this. To be able to just catalogue what is going on without judgement. You are not your emotions… and you are not your fear. You are you. And you are having an experience. And you may reinforce or end certain aspects of your experience at will. “Do as thou wilt”. Thank you Aleister.

Meditation empowers you, gives you self-confidence while you realize, more and more, the immense degree of control you have over your thoughts, your feelings, your body and your life experience.

Meditation helps you make better decisions. Period.

So what do you need to carry all that out? Health. Again, meditation helps you regain mental, emotional and physical health, so that you may enjoy your life to the MAX. You will begin to sleep much better within weeks. Your body is more attuned with “Who you truly are”. Your instincts become razor-sharp. I think Manly P Hall once wrote, with poetic license on my part: “Instinct is the footprint of God.”. Meditate on that. You release stress. Effortlessly. Within weeks.

How does all of this work?

Realize, that your mind is incredibly powerful. Meditation give you full access to that power. Jedi-like. You do no longer react to your life experience, you create your life experience.

Already two weeks into your meditation practice, you will experience yourself as calm. Your perception of yourself is more “positive”. Within a month you recognize increased self-mastery when it comes to your thoughts, emotions and bodily sensations. Your sensory apparatus switches from “receive” to “transceive”.

Within six months, you have laid the foundation for more focus. After a year, your thoughts serve You as a whole.

You become a creative power-house and begin to unfold your creative potential through focused and benevolent action.

“Doing No-Thing” thus preps you for inspired action. Fully aligned with your goals, your life purpose. Your action are active, inspired by joy. No longer reactive and fear-based. No limits, no limitation, no inhibition.

Meditation does not offer you a world of opportunities, it offers you a UNIVERSE of opportunities. Through being and doing no-thing you unleash your greatest imaginable potential.


Through a simpler, more fulfilled life. Through joy in just being. In complete freedom.

More focus, more joy, more freedom.

Try it! The biggest roadblock in our minds is that we THINK, answers have to be complicated and heady. Many of us are conditioned to react to simple solutions with skepticism and self-defence.

But is that really you? Or just your brain, your belief system defending itself against what it believes to be its death?

Did you just hear the horn sounding, too?


Note from the editor:

“I thank Steven Johnson, Founder of the Brainwave Research Institute for inspiring me to write this post. I highly recommend his “InnaPeace” program, which I tested extensively in the past weeks. I also thank my coach Stia. She has been both wonderful and instrumental in bringing about the inner change that made me write this article.”

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